Insight on the life ‘you’ think ‘you’ are living
By Nathalie Strassburg
Table of Contents
Part 1 – Foreward – Something to Say
Part 2 – The Life ‘You’ Think ‘You’ are Living
Part 3 – The Experience of ‘I’
Part 4 – The ‘I’’s World of Beliefs
Part 5 – “Living ‘I’” and Confining yourself to the ‘life of I’
Part 6 – The idea/non-idea of ‘life of ‘I’’
Part 1 – Foreward – Something to Say
Something to Say
‘I’ have been ‘contemplating’ the human existence for many years. ‘I’ have read countless books and filled my life with countless activities in order to try and understand the human psyche. This is what we call life. Many of you are doing the same thing, directly or indirectly. And some of the stuff out there is really interesting right. The problem though is that no matter how much they help or how smart the ideas seem you are left right where you started, with even more things going on in your mind. The world you are living in is created by your mind. And is all based on the non-negotiable assumption that a non-physical identity (call it ‘mind’, ‘me’, ‘I’ ‘self’ ‘soul’ ‘self-consciousness) actually exists. Life is life; the ‘problems’ are created when we insist that there is an operator that operates this body-mind system.
Some might say that this is just a theory. If you read it as a concept then yes it is a theory of non-theory. On a more experiential level though it is a practice. The understanding of the composition of the ‘I’ has been around forever. But people do not realize that contemplating it’s varied meanings and mentally trying to understand it still leaves you in the same place. We know all this stuff, and yet we cannot see it for what it is.
The words in this book will appear as just words. They will be interpreted and understood by each according to their own mind. Initially the mind will use thoughts of thoughts to try and understand a concept with ideas and meanings. Know that there is nothing to understand; this book is only a concept if you choose to see it that way.
This book is not intended to replace anything you think you have or believe. Your experience depends on your own reason, on your own practical experience of it, and on your own insight. Do not ‘believe’ anything I have written here, question it, look at this experience, this meaning you call ‘life’, discover your own insight, and look at your own mind and the idea of the mind, your thoughts and no-thoughts, and your truths and non-truths.
Language is even more limited by thought than thought. Here I make an attempt at describing my process of insight, my practice in understanding the nature of things, to see them just as they are.
We are brought up in this life by learning concepts, ideas and adding meanings. In the dimensions of the mind these concepts themselves get concepts to the point that there is no reality and non-reality. The non-understanding of this understanding is beyond the understanding of the mind. Thought is limited to thoughts, ideas, constructs, meanings and concepts.
For I looked everywhere for an answer, eventually concluding that there is only this reality. I learned not to be attached to all the meanings I had in my head. First the mind was shown that the stuff it considered negative was just ideas and not worth having. Then the mind could spend all its time filled with the stuff it considered good. Then there was the realization that these ‘good’ things were just as much a concept as the negative stuff. I promptly started spending my time replacing meanings of concepts with non-meanings of them.
Living in non-meaning seems rather meaningless and it will be experienced as such. Until of course there is the realization that it is meaningless because meaningless is in itself a concept of a concept. Anything and nothing and nothing about anything that the mind can think or not-think are still just thoughts. This multi-dimensional ‘world’ of thought is exactly that ‘world of thought’. There is nothing to know or know or not to know to know. If you are thinking or not-thinking about it, you are still living in the dimensions of thoughts and non-thoughts. Stating the obvious is a concept, but living it is a practice.
If this doesn’t make sense, you are trying to think about it, it is not suppose to make sense to the mind. It is not something to be understood or not to be understood.
The following pages tries to capture my experience of my last thoughts, until the thoughts realized the limitation of its thought of existence. To eventually discover that you can live in this reality without ‘living the life of ‘I’’. Without living that which you want and not want, without wanting, needing, gasping, suffering, or running after your emotions and feelings.
Thank you 🙂